Grace in Mommyhood

Today, I snapped at Buddy in the library...for reacting like a four year old.  The public library is where two of Buddy's favorite things collide:  time with his best friend and story time.  Is it any wonder he didn't want to leave? 

Buddy throwing a minor tantrum at the idea of leaving, set me on edge.  Buddy making Sweetpea cry because he is being bossy about leaving, set me further on edge.  Then as I am collecting our large stack of newly checked out books, Buddy whining and demanding my attention, my patience snaps. 

Immediately the self-recriminating thoughts set in.  We head home.  Looking back in the rear view mirror to see little hazel green eyes sadly staring out the back seat window made those awful thoughts grow.

"Why can't you be a more patient mom?" 
"He is just a four year old...way to show patience by example."
"Didn't you just say to yourself yesterday that you wanted to live Christ's love to your children?"
"You are a failure as mom...again."

Dwelling on these thoughts throughout lunch and nap time, made for a long few hours.  Then Buddy woke up from nap, and crawled up next to me.  He immediately cuddled in against me and I felt it anew. Grace.

Grace in the knowledge, that for some unknown reason, this four year old loves his mom.  Grace in the ability to move on and have a happy rest of the day.  So we do, we begin again and go past the point of frustration.  And face the afternoon and evening with happy hearts.

Thank you Father God for grace!  For Your grace, when I mess up and fail over and over, is infinitely greater than Buddy's grace.  Thank you for allowing me to go through life as Mommy with a new sense of Your undeserved gift of grace.

1 Corinthians 13 for Mothers

Here are two beautiful versions of 1 Corinthians 13 rewritten for mothers.  I saw the first one this past week while sitting in the hospital with Ladybug and cried.  So I'll share the joy with all you moms out there!

I Corinthians 13 for Mothers (by Jim Fowler)

If I live in a house of spotless beauty with everything in its place,
but have not love,
I am a housekeeper, not a homemaker.
If I have time for waxing, polishing, and decorative achievements,
but have not love,
my children learn cleanliness, not godliness.
If I scream at my children for every infraction,
and fault them for every mess they make,
but have not love,
my children become people-pleasers, not obedient children.
Love leaves the dust in search of a child’s laugh.
Love smiles at the tiny fingerprints on a newly cleaned window.
Love wipes away the tears before it wipes up the spilled milk.
Love picks up the child before it picks up the toys.
Love accepts the fact that I am the ever-present “mommy,”
the taxi-driver to every childhood event,
the counsellor when my children fail or are hurt.
Love crawls with the baby, walks with the toddler, and runs with the child,
then stands aside to let the youth walk into adulthood.
Before I became a mother I took glory in my house of perfection.
Now I glory in God’s perfection of my child.
All the projections I had for my house and my children
have faded away into insignificance,
And what remain are the memories of my kids.
Now there abides in my home scratches on most of the furniture,
dishes with missing place settings,
and bedroom walls full of stickers, posters and markings,
But the greatest of all is the Love
that permeates my relationships with my children.

© Jim Fowler, Christ in You Ministries. Reproduced with permission. Please refer to Christ in You website for more adaptations of 1 Corinthians 13 for parents, fathers, etc


1 Corinthians 13 for Moms
I can read bedtime stories till the cow jumps over the moon
and sing "Ten Little Monkeys" until I want to call the doctor...
but if I don't have love, I'm as annoying as a ringing phone.
I can chase a naked toddler through the house while cooking dinner and listening to voice mail.
I can fix the best cookies and Kool-Aid in the neighborhood
and I can tell a sick child's temperature with one touch of my finger...
but if I don't have love, I am nothing.
Love is patient while watching and praying by the front window when it's 30 minutes past curfew.
Love is kind when my teen says, "I hate you!"
Love does not envy the neighbors' swimming pool or their brand-new mini van,
but trusts the Lord to provide every need.
Love does not brag when other parents share their disappointments and insecurities,
and love rejoices when other families succeed.
Love doesn't boast,
even when I've multi-tasked all day long and my husband can't do more than one thing at a time.
Love is not rude when my spouse innocently asks, "What have you done today?"
Love does not immediately seek after glory when we see talent in our children,
but encourages them to get training and make wise choices.
Love is not easily angered,
even when my 15-year-old acts like the world revolves around her.
Love does not delight in evil (is not self-righteous)
when I remind my 17-year-old that he's going 83 in a 55-mph zone, but rejoices in the truth.
Love does not give up hope.
Love always protects our children's self-esteem and spirit,
even while doling out discipline.
Love always trusts God to protect our children when we cannot.
Love always perseveres,
through blue nail polish, burps and other bodily functions, rolled eyes and crossed arms, messy rooms and sleepovers.
Love never fails.
But where there are memories of thousands of diaper changes and painful labor, they will fade away.
Where there is talking back, it will (eventually) cease.
Where there is a teenager who thinks she knows everything,
there will one day be an adult who knows you did your best.
For we know we fail our children, and we pray they don't end up in therapy,
but when we get to heaven, our imperfect parenting will disappear.
(Thank you, God!)
When we were children, we needed a parent to love and protect us.
Now that we're parents ourselves,
we have a heavenly Father who adores, shelters us and holds us when we need to cry.
And now these three remain: faith, hope and love.
But the greatest of these is LOVE!!
--Author Unknown

Joyful Mom

Life as Mom has a great series of posts entitled "To Be More Joyful".  I recently read all the posts and it was a good reminder to work on my joy as a parent.  Often, after putting Buddy and Sweetpea to bed (and they stay there), I breathe a sigh of relief to have 'survived' another day.  I don't want to just survive...I want to enjoy motherhood.  I bookmarked the first page and, over the next month or so, I plan to re-read and focus on areas that need work in my life.  My prayer is that God will help me to recover joy from each day and to zoom in on the good rather than the bad. 
Check out all 14 posts for very practical tips to ramp up your joy as a mother!